Justin and Lindsey Holcomb have done it again. As with their earlier work on sexual assault, Rid of My Disgrace, their most recent book Is It My Fault?: Hope and Healing for Those Suffering Domestic Violence, goes where most Christian authors can’t or won’t go. Justin and Lindsey have the unique pastoral ability–and the theology to back it–to shine a light in the darkest of human experiences: abuse from the hands of another human. Truly, the Holcombs are lights in the darkness. Continue reading
It started when I was nine.
A few days before, some friends were giggling about this thing called sex. Curiosity had been stirring within me, and I finally did it: I searched for it on Google. Up came countless links to pornographic websites. I clicked on many of them, and the screen was soon covered with explicit pop-ups. A flood of intense shame came over me. But I wanted to see more.
I almost got caught soon afterwards, and I resolved to never do it again. I came too close to being exposed, and the shame was too much. I soon learned that you hide to survive.
I used to think I had to be a soldier in God’s army.
Now, I realize I’m just a cripple at the gate called Beautiful.
In 1985 Christian glam metal band Stryper, released the first Christian metal album to achieve Gold record status – selling over a half million copies. I remember my older sister anxiously awaiting their first full length album, Soldiers Under Command, that spring of ’85. It was this anthem that catapulted me into lifelong desire to be a fit, strong, and victorious soldier in God’s army: Continue reading
Almost two decades ago, I was sexually assaulted by two young men, both of whom I knew. The incident ended with them threatening my life if I told anyone. A year later, I was raped by one of them–a fact which I denied to myself (completely and totally), until two and a half years later, I suffered twice more, at the hands of different men. Continue reading
“The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” (John 1:5)
We’ve all been hurt. In numerous ways. There’s the hurts that come and go throughout the day because we’re humans interacting with other humans (big and small). These hurts are small, small enough to be soothed with a nice word, a tub filled with warm water and Calgon, or a glass of wine (or all three). Then there are the hurts we’ve experienced in our lives that are bigger than a glass of wine or a kind word; those hurts are the ones we store away in the many closets in our mind.
“There is an epidemic of sexual assault, and victims need the kind of hope and help that only the gospel of Jesus Christ can provide.” – Mark Driscoll
So begins the forward to the book, Rid of My Disgrace, by Justin and Lindsey Holcomb. And this book does in fact provide that needed hope and help for victims of sexual assault. I picked it up at a Mockingbird Conference in NYC. As a theologian of the Cross and lover of all books that iterate and reiterate the message of Grace to those who are suffering, I could not resist its pull. I spend so much time in academe studying theology that I often get quite thirsty for real-life application. And theology that has no bearing on real-life, that does not connect with our day-in-day-out, cannot really call itself true theology. If God is for us, then the words about God should be for us, too. Continue reading
In this series, we started at the minute clinic and we saw our desperate need for help in relationship, next we moved on to the truth that Christ also understands broken relationship. He felt everything we feel, he knows how we hurt for he himself was hurt in relationship. Today I want to give you some more good news. It is good news for the relationship failure; for the one who is self-focused; for the one who is impatient with the change in others’ lives but is comfortable with the slow as molasses change in their own; for the one who reopens wounds daily, for the one who is demanding with those around them; for the one who feels like even when they try, they never get it right; for the one who has given up on all relationship because of the pain relationships bring; for the broken; for the down-trodden; for those who have called it quits: You are loved, you are forgiven, you are not alone. Continue reading
Holidays always make me feel like a loser.
It’s a time that I let the comparison crud creep into my heart more than others.
It’s all around me, in my face: the crafts, the traditions, the moms who make every day special (or so it seems).
It’s what I begin to rate my motherhood by.
Am I doing enough? Is it special enough, unique enough, healthy enough, elaborate enough, simple enough, spiritual enough, fun enough?